The Shelton J. Haynes Clown Show Must Go On. And Now, It Does

The Shelton J. Haynes Clown Show Must Go On. And Now, It Does

While it betrays no other identity, the Shelton J. Haynes clown show is so amateurish, the “masterminds” should stop embarrassing themselves as well the RIOC CEO. Slipshod and awkward to a fault, the continuing series of articles achieves the opposite of what’s intended.

The Roosevelt Island Daily News

The Roosevelt Island Daily News

The relentlessly blundering series of articles struggling to promote RIOC President/CEO Shelton J. Haynes dumped another one into the Internet universe on Friday. Shelton Haynes Credits Expert Staff at Youth Center for Outstanding Success is not about that. It’s about praising Haynes’s brilliant efforts while allowing a tiny tip of the hat to Ana Medina, the program’s director.

Topping the Shelton Haynes Clown Show

photo of three women riding car
Photo by Layton Findlater on

Before a single word of content, there’s this giant full page photo of Haynes himself, suited up and in full toothy smile.

The first line: “If there’s one thing that Shelton Haynes can say about the human touch, it’s that it can be very effective in impacting other people’s lives.”

There’s not a single image from the Youth Center nor anyone involved in it. Medina waits until paragraph five before getting a cursory nod. In the meantime, in a classic example of “keyword stuffing,” an SEO beginners blunder, a no-no for years now, Haynes’s name pops up nine times.

Only a single paragraph is Haynes-free.

One professional with close ties to the Youth Center summed it up: “Just f—–g stupid.”

Bringing AI Into the Mix

“Taking advantage of the time needed for the renovations,” begins a section headlined “Shelton Haynes wants to see renovations.”

“Shelton Haynes decided to bring the center’s management back to the local community. Roosevelt Island, long known for its healthcare and institutional history, has a population of 12,000, giving it a small-town atmosphere in the middle of New York City.”

Only machine-learning, poorly applied, can be that stupid. Of course, Haynes never did any such thing.

Note to the Masterminds: You’re supposed to edit AI output.”

“But garbage in, garbage out” has long been a computer-related slogan.

A wag familiar with RIOC operations says that, in this case, AI stands for “As—le Intelligence.”

Also, an editor’s hand steps in, adding hot links to the article. These usually boost search engine optimization (SEO) with outside supporting links. But the creators of the Haynes clown show are clueless.

A link to the term “outstanding and complimentary staff” at the Youth Center connects with an earlier article touting Haynes’s managing a “model” public safety department.

Who Writes This Junk?

Mercifully, the geniuses behind this series stopped pinning authorship on President Assistant Vice President Akeem Jamal. But for a change, it’s not anonymous.

The writing, such as it is, is credited to Prince Sharma, a locally interesting name for someone with no listed biography.

Hosting is Wonder World Space out of Debden, Saskatchewan, Canada. Wonder World is what used to be called “a content farm.” Content farms load up with guest posts on a limitless range of subjects, the idea being accumulating so much material that internet searches must come its way.

This is the equivalent of throwing you know what against a wall to see what sticks. It’s also considered detritus across the internet because the actual content is thin, frequently inaccurate and littered with link bait.

That’s the company the Shelton J. Haynes clown show brings to the world from Roosevelt Island.

Note: Somebody please ask Governor Hochul’s RIOC handlers to plead with Haynes to stop embarrassing himself and Roosevelt Island as well as RIOC.

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