No, it’s air pollution, not a new patroon for Roosevelt Island

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Residents may have mistaken the signal as a Vatican-style announcement, but air pollution is the real culprit. This is the stack above Roosevelt Island Dry Cleaners spewing filthy air skyward over the community.

By David Stone

The Roosevelt Island Daily News

Air pollution, for at least the second time, this week, was smoke from the dry cleaner’s faulty boiler. It merged with the already not so great New York City air. But hearts chilled on learning that the super secret governing council known as RIOC or “Albany” had not elected a new patroon for the Island.

But there might be a grain of insight. Elbow and Ass Distinction Disorder (EADD) is widely suspected as endemic within the patroonship. And with air pollution fingered as accountable for fogging minds, the thought is that at least a partial explanation had been found.

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